Monthly Archives: February 2009

Waitin’ On A Woman

Today wasn’t my typical Saturday. I guess in many ways though it was about what it should be. I didn’t spend the entire day cleaning, although I sure could have. I forced myself out of bed this morning to help with building cleanup since I missed the last three weeks of it and Cynthia has been trying to guilt me into going. Of course, she wasn’t there this morning cause she was at work, but I went nonetheless. It was actually the quickest building cleanup I’ve ever done. We were done about 8:45 and I don’t recall ever being out of there before 9:30 before.

That gave me enough time to come home and take a shower before going into work to meet a customer who was returning some gear. I was very pleased to get over 41 mpg driving to the office. I have to wonder if Toyota did in fact do something to the Camry as it seems to have been getting much better gas mileage lately than it typically would.

I came home and went through the mail. It was just about perfect timing as there were a few things that I needed to take care of in there. I didn’t get very far with cleaning up my desk, but at least it isn’t getting any worse. I had an interesting encounter regarding spaghetti today. i was asked to bring some for break the fast tomorrow. The sheet said to bring it cooked, but I asked if there was really a reason to cook it ahead of time with it then needing to be reheated. I was told it was ok for me to bring the spaghetti uncooked, but to make sure the sauce was cooked. That really threw me off. Am I supposed to take the sauce out of the jar, heat it up and then put it in some container to take it to church where it can sit in my car from 11 till 4 and then need to be reheated? I won’t even mention the health concerns, or that it would need to go in the fridge. I also had to explain that me bringing spaghetti doesn’t necessarily involve me bringing a sauce for it. I guess we are just all on different pages with our pasta. I think I’ll just be bringing a package of spaghetti and a jar of sauce and we’ll let the girls figure it out from there. Maybe I’m just in an argumentative mood lately.

After I finished eating lunch, I went to Pat & Oscar’s with Lauren (Kristin) and had some breadsticks. We had a good time talking and we confirmed that Shelby is in fact not engaged, some guy just made a fake wedding announcement for the fun of it I guess. She didn’t even know about it, so it was a good thing that we called her. After that I came home and hung the pictures on the walls that they’ve been sitting in front of for nearly a week. I had a heck of a time in the living room. I kept hitting things that didn’t seem like studs, so I was scared to keep driving the nail in. I repositioned everything three times on the wall before deciding to go with it for now.

I then read through a lot of the newspapers that have been piling up. I still have more to go through, but I made a good valiant effort at getting through them. I think I’m going to recycle my Soduku stack too as I get two new ones everyday, I probably don’t need to keep all the old ones since we haven’t had a shortage problem for a while now. I watched Meet Dave tonight. I thought it was pretty funny and had a good story line.

Still no news … It really bites that something that feels so right hurts so much.

I’m really not ready for tomorrow, or next week for that matter. I think there is too much unfinished business from this past week to move on. I also know that tomorrow is going to end up being so hectic and long that I’m just not looking forward to it. I think I may have to go back to that stand about taking a break. I think it would be that much harder to to now with the recent events as no one would believe me that they aren’t related. I’ve had the desire for a break since long before I had the desire to breakup a friendship or two. Regardless, i think it’s a mute point as I’m sure I just need to endure, although I could do with a few less things on my plate. Maybe I need to delegate off the coordination with the missionaries to one of my counselors.

Twitter Updates for 2009-02-28

  • Off to building cleanup even if I’m late. #
  • as if it wasn’t enough that I went in to work on Tuesday, I’m going in today too! What a whiner I am! Happy Birthday Batch! #
  • Countrywide wants to know who my maid of honor was. They also want to know where I met my spouse. I’d like to know myself. #
  • Countrywide. You will win the award of the worst site in the world today. I keep getting a loop trying to pay my mortgage! #
  • has been on the phone with Verizon for 20 minutes over a $0.95 charge on my bill. Maybe not the most efficient use of time… #
  • 35 minutes later, 411 charge voided, Internet speeds doubled, more HD channels and I’m paying $10 less per month! #
  • Is there an application for escort services on the iPhone? @losteimle wants to know. #
  • Not normal Saturday but Ive been somewhat productive. Went through all the mail. Lunch with @losteomle Hung pictures. Cleaned up newspapers #

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Twitter Updates for 2009-02-27

  • home after what feels like another long day in the field. Looks like the Alta Murrieta Ward Missionaries will be moving in soon. #
  • nearly fell asleep at the computer listening to Shelly’s music. maybe i need a quiet evening at home. #
  • I guess it’s my turn now: Im glad to know that when I’m honest with my so called friends they in turn decide to be childish. Honesty is best #
  • I hate leaving voicemail. On the bright side it feels good to have the truth out there and to have this out of my hands for now. #
  • Sometimes the road up the mountain has switchbacks in it and you end up going backward or down in moving forward in the pursuit of the top. #

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He Said Son, Since 1952, I’ve Been

Sometimes the road up the mountain has some switch-backs in it and you end up back tracking in the process of making it to the top. The pursuit of happiness isn’t always happy.

I said some not so nice things tonight via text and twitter, but I am going to stand by them. I’ll probably get in more trouble for revealing some facts tonight that I would normally keep boxed up as well. Hopefully I’ll stand by that decision in the morning as well. I was uninvited to Disneyland tonight due to events from earlier this week. It was clear that Larilyn didn’t want to be anywhere near me and so I guess the event tonight became girls only. To be quite honest, I don’t agree with it, but I would have been ok with it if that had been the way I was told it. Instead, I was told flat out that I was uninvited. Eventually I was told it became a girls night out. The funniest part of the whole thing was that I was so tired tonight I wasn’t planning on going to begin with! I wasn’t trying to avoid anyone; I just knew when I fell asleep at the computer driving an hour to Disneyland wasn’t going to be in my best interest or that of those others on the road.

I’ve been trying to tell Maegan all week. For whatever reason she has been avoiding me, so I left her a voicemail tonight. It only took three attempts to try and get some of what I wanted to say into a 3 minute voicemail (or whatever her time limit is). It really needed to be at least a fifteen minute conversation and I hate that it wasn’t done in person or at least in realtime. On the bright side, it is off my plate now and I can stop worrying about what I’m going to say and instead just continue to wait. Maybe I will have ended up ruining three friendships tonight, but I’m going to be selfish tonight and be ok with that.

I know very well from past experience that bottling up my feelings and not sharing them doesn’t help the situation, so I’m going to try and be more open and make sure my intentions are understood by all as early on as possible. Maegan may still come back to set me straight and tell me to leave her alone, but at least I will know for sure at that point and I will be able to move forward instead of running in circles around this mess.

The rest of the day was pretty crazy. I was back out in the field today, again back at UCSD for a good portion of the day and Batch and I took care of a few other things on the way back. We had a late lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings, without Megan who is having way too much fun over in England right now I’m sure.

I met with a senior missionary from the Riverside California Mission this evening. It sounds like the Alta Murrieta Ward missionaries will be moving in most likely next Monday. I have a few reservations, but I think it will be good and I’m prepared to make a few sacrifices if necessary for a while to give them an appropriate place to live. If nothing else it should really help me be missionary minded and hopefully keep me out of trouble cause I don’t need any more of that right now.

And I think with that I have caused enough trouble for one night and I’m going to call it quits and head to bed. I’m going to try to make it to building cleanup tomorrow since I haven’t been there all month. I’ve selectively neglected it long enough, even if Cynthia won’t be there to guilt me into coming tomorrow.

Twitter Updates for 2009-02-26

  • So I was telling and showing Alison how my Facebook iPhone app still wouldn’t work when it actually opened! And still working now. Idk! #
  • There is a slight chance we went a little overboard with the cookies this year. Good thing we have a big warehouse. http://twitpic.com/1pgy4 #
  • I’ve been on the road today and working out in the field. I’m ready for a nap – oh, and lunch! #
  • enjoyed an inspiring time at Institute. Now it’s time to watch my hour of TV for the week. I wish Grissom would come back to #CSI. #
  • That may have been the last #csi I waste my time watching. What have the writers been thinking? #

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I Nodded Yes, Said How ‘Bout You

I spent the bulk of today doing the physical work for the software programming I did yesterday. For the most part it went well, but there were some things that people didn’t seem to plan into the install, so I’ll be going back tomorrow to finish it up. I hope that it doesn’t take all day, cause I haven’t done any office work since Monday and I’m really starting to get worried about how far behind I am. I even thought about getting some done tonight, but I was just too darn tired.

We had a great lesson at institute tonight. I had read Section 19 a few times before going so I was a bit more into it than I normally am with just barely reading it before class. Of course I can’t remember the pattern, so Sister Dowden you’ll have to help me out there. Listen > See > Know. We talked a lot about having the spirit withdrawn from you, the three deaths and so forth.

I was so tired after work that I barely made it upstairs to check on things before deciding to just vedge on the couch before institute. I enjoyed some Without a Trace, and then watched CSI after Institute. CSI seems to have gone so downhill lately though, I’m not sure if I will be making it a priority to watch it. I should also probably mention that I haven’t seen the last two episodes of 24, so I guess I’m not that interested in TV in general lately.

I did get a good night’s sleep last night, or at least better than I have been lately. I don’t know if it is the sleep deprivation or that my mind wasn’t racing as much. Again, I’m not pleased with where things went yesterday, but I am at peace with myself that they were done. Half of the battle is done and now I just need to handle the second attack. Too bad that one hasn’t been panning out so well for me. Maybe there will be no second battle and this whole thing will come to pass.

Are You Waitin’ on a Woman?

Where do I start today? Do you want the good news or the bad news? Well, I guess I’ll start with the bad news and at the beginning. The day didn’t start off so well. I’m sure some feelings were hurt and I know that it wasn’t done in the best way possible by me. Never-less the time had presented itself and I felt it was best to get it out there.

I spent most of the day in the office speaking RS-232 ASCII. It wasn’t so fun all the time and was quite frustrating trying to figure out what the heck was getting in the way. In the end we played with enough things and were finally able to get it to work. The process of learning new things can always be interesting. It was probably good that I didn’t interact much with customers and so forth as I know I didn’t have my happy face on and I didn’t like that. I think Effie was really ready to send me home more than once.

I met up with Alison tonight and we tried Penfolds Cattle Company. Aside from the fact that i was way underdressed it was alright. It was better than Outback for sure, but also considerably more expensive. It wasn’t quite Ruth’s Chris in quality or price, but not bad once you factor in not having to drive and make reservations. I really needed to talk to her and hear about what was going on with her instead of focusing on my own problems like I have been doing for the past week. I’m supposed to come up with a surprise place for us to go next week and of course I got in trouble for cheating on her with Oscar’s last week.

Well, I guess I’d better call it a night before midnight tonight and hope that I can get some sleep without tossing and turning all night. Tomorrow should be another fun day of programming and working in the field. Let’s hope I do a bit better in the friendship department tomorrow.

And Asked Me

I had a great time at the temple this morning. After working in initiatories for a while, I did a session before getting called back down to help with some walk ins. I spent a good hour sitting in the celestial room after my shift hoping to solve all the problems in the world or at least the one current one. I felt as if I am on the right track, even if right now that track seems to be going nowhere.

I came into work to try and get some programing done on a project, but while we were able to get started, I couldn’t get it all done and had to call it quits when quitting time came. I had found an opening in the temple’s baptistry earlier in the day, so I got Kenny to see who he could round up to go do baptisms tonight and finishing this project wasn’t worth not going back to the temple for.

We had a smaller, but great group tonight: Melissa M, Brooke B, Jordyn, Krystal, Ken and myself. We were able to just slide in, get the work done and get out of there fairly quickly. It was so nice to not worry like we do sometimes about who is doing what and to just get the work done. We were blessed to work with some others that had shown up and made the time go by smoothly, effectively and efficiently. We stopped by Fudds on the way out.

Twitter Updates for 2009-02-24

  • Not such a fan of sleepless nights. I really don’t feel so good this morning, but am happy to be going to the temple. #
  • Free tacos. Free pancakes. Why did I pay for lunch? Four doughnut holes later and I’m wishing I hadn’t ate anything. #
  • Another great sunset tonight. http://twitpic.com/1oerv en route to temple again. Now for baptisms. #
  • Had a good time at the temple tonight doing baptisms. Now I think it’s time for lunch. #

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Twitter Updates for 2009-02-23

  • I really need to sleep more. Or maybe I should just be happy I am sleeping at all and find peace in knowing this will come to pass. Plan! #
  • Work’s in the middle of nowhere, only one way to get there: gotta get a little mudon the tires! Try out the 4wd. We might just get stuck. #
  • I got distracted by the beautiful sunset on my way home driving down los alamos. #
  • has a few options for things to do tonight, but is waitin’ on a woman for the one thing that he wants to accomplish… #
  • I think I’m going to go experiment with where to put some new holes in the walls… Maybe I’ll go frame shopping after the temple tomorrow. #
  • framed a lot of pictures tonight, but none actually got hung. Planning on going to Crate & Barrel to get some frames for 1 more tomorrow. #

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He Sat Down in His Overalls

I’m definitely not doing so well with this internal debate I’m having. It’s a good thing I’m so sleep deprived; otherwise I’d worry that I’d be up all night discovering that on a “midnight Tuesday you can have pizza ordered in.” Oh wait, I forgot I’m living my life in a Brad Paisley song and not one from Emerson Drive. Also, I’m not eating. Well, I’ve been forcing myself to eat, but it hasn’t been going so well. Lunch o’clock came around today and I wasn’t even hungry. I think I’ve lost a few pounds since Saturday and am trying really hard to stay hydrated.

I spent most of the day today catching up on emails and bills. I actually felt like I was making progress and I saw the stack on my desk dwindle. On my lunch break (at 2 something mind you), Batch and I went to the bank (work), Radio Shack (work) and then Costco to pick up the pictures I had printed Saturday. Most of them turned out really well. I am still amazed at the black levels in the one picture of the moon; I’d have to look at the metadata, but I’m sure it’s at a really high ISO and there is no noise in the print.

I spent some time tonight framing those pictures and some I already had. I think I’m going to stop by Crate & Barrel tomorrow after the temple to grab some frames to match the one I already have the pictures from Wicked when Krystal and I went. I’m going to expand the Wicked wall there with at least a picture of Maegan and I. I may find some other expensive frames I like while I’m there too, so hopefully I can control myself. I also need to find something to house all the pictures of Melissa. That could be nearly impossible, but I need to get it done as I promised it to her over a year ago.

I’m so excited to go to the temple tomorrow. I definitely have some questions I’d like to spend some time discussing and get further clarification on some other things I’ve been pondering and feeling lately. I’m curious what I’ll be doing, but I’m sure it will be great regardless.

I hope I can get some sleep tonight so I can manage at the temple tomorrow. I almost ended up crying myself to sleep last night. I just got caught up in praying and lost it. I was finally able to get myself back into control and then I was out minutes later. In missionary correlation yesterday, AJ challenged us to choose something to fast from for 40 days and 40 sleepless nights. I think the sleepless nights was only for me. I think I’m going to fast from sleeping in as I think that is one thing that has been setting me back lately. I have not been doing so well with reading before I leave for work and I have just been getting there later and later. Tuesday’s will still have to be the exception where I don’t sit and read before leaving, but I think with my destination in mind the exception is warranted. I will resolve again to not leave the house without reading and will help to fix that problem and let me spend the appropriate amount of time by not sleeping in so much. I think it will be hard with my current sleep deprivation, but I’m going to try. And with that note, I’m going to bed, only an hour and a half late tonight!

Sittin’ on a Bench at West Town Mall

Wow, two nights in a row. What must be wrong? Today was quite interesting. I guess in many ways it was a typical Sunday, but it was different in many ways. First off, all I wanted to do was sleep this morning and I really didn’t want to get up and get going for church. I pulled myself out of bed about 8:30 to make breakfast, prepare a lesson and have time to get ready with all the other stuff. I still barely made it to my first meeting at 11.

The Diffley’s spoke today a lot on education and preparing for the future. The typical talks about saving money, getting a good education, etc. I do keep wondering if I should go back to school, but I don’t know why I would do such a thing. It isn’t going to help me advance in my current job, but maybe I could learn something that would help me or maybe I just do it for the sake of doing it. Then reality hits me and I have to ask when in the world would I make time for school amongst the other things I’m already doing? Something would have to give and I’d have to start practicing a lot more selective neglect.

The Diffley’s spoke tonight at branch prayer about relationships. It wasn’t the typical marriage talk, but they kind of continued from some things they had mentioned this afternoon. Whenever possible marry someone within your race and your religion. It makes things easier down the road, especially when children come into the picture. I’d like to think I can handle that, but sometimes I wonder at 27 if that is going to happen. I may have the house and the car for the family, but there is no family in what I can see. They shared the experience of their first date. Sister Diffley said it was the best first date she’d ever had. Paul was the perfect gentleman. They had a nice dinner in Balboa and then she said something about a place in Westwood that had an ice cream with something on top and he said let’s go! I thought that sounded so totally like me. Drive to Arizona for dinner? OK. Vegas for dessert? No problem.

They said you need to communicate well. There will be give and takes. You need some common interests and similarities. I agreed with everything they said. I was happy I went as I was considering not going so I could write to Tara and get to bed at a reasonable time. I still did write to Tara, and I’m not getting to bed when I should, especially considering my sleep deficit I already have from this past weekend. This probably isn’t going to help my resolve to get up early and get back in the habit of reading in the mornings.

This was the second Sunday in a row that I didn’t go to the Dowden’s. This time it was their fault! Sister Dowden wasn’t feeling well so she cancelled dinner. I couldn’t eat anyway, so I guess it didn’t matter. I was so starving when I came home from church, but nothing sounded good. I ate a bit of Maegan’s leftovers from Oscar’s, but they just weren’t cutting it. I guess I’m going to be trying a new diet of not eating much. I love food so much that it really gets to me when I don’t feel like eating.

I gave a lesson in elders quorum today on Elder Wirthlin’s talk “Come What May, and Love It.” When I first read it yesterday it wasn’t really speaking to me, but this morning I was getting all sorts of good things out of it and President Monson’s talk “Finding Joy in the Journey.” I didn’t have much time, so we only covered the first one briefly in elders quorum today, but I got the benefit of studying both of them! It is quite possible that my favorite story from conference was the one Elder Wirthlin shared of his daughter and the blind date that turned out to be there to pick up one of the other daughters for baby-sitting. He suggest we learn to laugh at things and not get stressed over the trivial things. I can think of many times when I’ve laughed things off. I love it when people are in such a hurry to get to the next red light! He also counsels that we should seek for the eternal instead of getting caught up in the moment. The parking spot doesn’t matter in the big picture. I’m a big believer in that good things come from adversity and our trials, which was his third point: the principle of compensation. Finally he suggests we “put our trust in our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.” Sometimes this is the hardest one, but the hardest things also come with the richest rewards.

I also really enjoyed President Monson’s talk on fining joy in the journey. It reminds me of the song Simple Miracles performed by Emerson Drive:

It’s a dream that never dies
It’s the wonder in your eyes
it’s the magic in your touch
Every star and every wish
I wake each day and live
A life that’s filled with simple miracles

We really need to spend more time stopped and smelling the roses, enjoying a butterfly in flight and all the other simple miracles that surround us everyday.

I guess I might as well get used to it;
She’ll take her time ’cause I don’t mind
Waitin’ on a woman
(slightly modified from Brad Paisley’s Waitin’ on a Woman)

Twitter Updates for 2009-02-23

  • not eating lunch or dinner on Saturday leads to a rush to eat breakfast on Sunday. Bad plan. Must get ready for #lds church now. #
  • I’m starving yet nothing sounds good. This can’t be a good sign. #
  • yikes! where has the night gone? I still need to write to Tara… maybe I’ll skip branch prayer tonight. #
  • Branch prayer’s thought was on relationships. Give and take. Communicate. Diffleys shared first date. Dinner in balboa. Dessert in Westwood! #
  • Sister Caldwell’s letter is ready to go. Maybe I’ll get the mail when I take it out in the morning Becky! Now to wind down for bed… #

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Twitter Updates for 2009-02-22

  • not eating lunch or dinner on Saturday leads to a rush to eat breakfast on Sunday. Bad plan. Must get ready for #lds church now. #
  • I’m starving yet nothing sounds good. This can’t be a good sign. #
  • yikes! where has the night gone? I still need to write to Tara… maybe I’ll skip branch prayer tonight. #
  • Branch prayer’s thought was on relationships. Give and take. Communicate. Diffleys shared first date. Dinner in balboa. Dessert in Westwood! #
  • Sister Caldwell’s letter is ready to go. Maybe I’ll get the mail when I take it out in the morning Becky! Now to wind down for bed… #

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