Tag Archives: Funnies

Marketing Terms

PSW Sound Reinforcement Forums: The Basement => How marketing works!
Here is an explanation of the different marketing terms:

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I am very rich. Marry me!”
That’s Direct Marketing

You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, “He’s very rich. Marry him.”
That’s Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m very rich. Marry me.”
That’s Telemarketing.

You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink. You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say, “By the way, I’m very rich. Will you marry me?”
That’s Public Relations.

You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says, “You are very rich, I want to marry you.”
That’s Brand Recognition.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I’m rich. Marry me!” She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
That’s Customer Feedback.

Need a Doorstop? Use a VGA Card!

I was walking up the stairs to my tax accounting class this evening and had to do a double-take on the doorstop. Fortunately for you, I decided to go back and get a picture of it for you!

VGA Doorstop

Yes, that is a VGA display card. There was actually three of them in the doors there with one regular rubber doorstop. I guess Cal State Fullerton had some excess VGA cards lying around. I would assume this would work well with other cards if you have some collecting dust.

What to do on a Thursday Evening?

Well, really it was more like an afternoon and evening…

I found out around 3 o’clock this afternoon that Telex/EV was doing a Midnight Madness sale today.

So far we’ve only got a couple mics at a damn good deal, but yes, I have been sitting here since 3. And no, I’m not the only one… pyro and Chad have been watching for most of the time too!

Finally around 9 o’clock, Pyro, Chad and I are all in a text chat talking about the sale and what we were dreaming we had bought so far:

Chad Costanzo: so do we just have the mics?
Scott Chester: that’s all i’ve ordered
Chad Costanzo: i ordered the line array
Scott Chester: and if we don’t buy anything else, i might call and get a few of the other mics
Scott Chester: sweet
Chad Costanzo: 6 grand i got it for
Scott Chester: going to be here in time for the 4th?
Scott Chester: so we can cancel lane?
Chad Costanzo: nope
Chad Costanzo: and no amps
Scott Chester: so we just need to get 2 xl4s then
Chad Costanzo: yea baby
Scott Chester: something current
Nathaniel Pitcher: yeah, really
Nathaniel Pitcher: 4ch comp
Nathaniel Pitcher: this is sad… it’s like QVC for Audio Geeks!
Scott Chester: lol
Chad Costanzo: in slow motion
Scott Chester: that was awesome!

Leave it to Pyro!

And so far we still haven’t seen a shout-out for CBC!

Sob Stories on Grades

I got this email from one of my professors yesterday:

Final Grades are posted on BB. The following were the “Running Totals” necessary for the respective grades:

87.2+ = A
77.2-87.1 = B
66.4-77.1 = C
56.4-66.3 = D
<56.4 = F. I am sorry if you missed a grade by .1.  I actually made the curve more generous than originally determined, and I will not be changing it any further to accommodate sob stories.  I will not be around during the summer, nor will I be checking my CSUF e-mail on a regular basis. Have a great summer.

I thought it was awesome, so I figured I had to share it. Fortunately, I got an A in this class, but only by 0.8 points!

Where to Place a Lav Mic, Rear Projection

Mike North posted this over at PSW and I thought it was just too funny to pass up:

We had a presenter not too long ago who insisted that we attach his lav somewhere around his mid-torso, rather than up around the 2nd button of his shirt. We protested, and his answer was, and I quote:

“If the mic is that high, the audience hears the sound before they hear my words.”

I really wish I could make this sort of thing up. Really, I do.

and then there was:

My experience Bink, is that when setting up delay screens in the house, if rear projected (ideal in most situations) and the projection path is not masked off…invariably some punter will do me the favor of pointing out that the image is backwards on those screens and they can’t read them.

I turned around and kept on mixing (just to keep this on topic) and grabbed the video guy on com to see if I could get a laugh out of him, and he replied “Damn it! I knew something wasn’t right…” And he then apologized to the producer for hanging the screen backwards. I about fell off the FOH riser I was laughing so hard.

-Mikey P

Jigsaw Puzzle

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, “Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get it started.”

Her boyfriend asks, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”  The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a tiger.”

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

“First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger.” He takes her hand and says,
“Second, I want you to relax. Let’s have a nice cup of tea, and then…..” he sighed, “…let’s put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box!!!

Frivolous Lawsuits

oulair.com: one messed up world

So some guy is suing Apple because he feels that the iPod could cause hearing loss. Yes, you got that right… COULD CAUSE hearing loss. He hasn’t suffered any. He just want’s to get rich because it is technically possible for him and others to suffer! What is this world coming too?

Isn’t hearing damage dependent on amount of use? I mean, if I wanted to listen to my iPod loud for one song, that isn’t going to damage my hearing as much as if I listened to it the whole day at the same volume. Apple (and others) can’t possibly be expected to take responsibility for how users choose to abuse their products.

So does that mean that I can sue QSC or Crown if I hook up headphones to the output of one of their pro audio amplifiers? Or, for that matter, can we sue Bose, Yamaha, JBL, EV, etc because they make speakers that can produce more than 85 db?

I guess that means I can sue people who make bull horns, air horns, buzzers, alarms and many more too… How about we sue the police department when they pull us over because their siren was too loud? Even better, we should stop the fire truck while they are in route to the fire because their siren might damage my hearing if I was stuck to the front of the truck!

We’re Not in Kansas, but We Do Get Twisters

I was going to invite you to read this article from the LA Times, March 10, 2005, but they want to charge you to read it!

It talked about some of the times that LA has had weird weather in the past, as opposed to our normal summer in January stuff.

There was a snowball fight in 1932 outside Pasadena City College where the students were throwing rock filled snowballs across Colorado Blvd. When the police showed, several students deflated the tired and took the keys to the squad cars. The dean of the collge got out a bullhorn and said, “Please remember, you are Pasadena gentlemen.” At the same time Chatsworth was buried under 5 inches of snow and Albert Einsten wasn’t vising CalTech and commented that the had enough of the white stuff back home in Germany “and came here for sunshine.”

There was also snow in 1949. In Altadena, Christmas Tree Lane became a minature ski run.

The article also mentioned two tornados. One was in 1983 which took part of the convention center with it when it ran along the Harbor Freeway. Another hit Hawthorne in March of 1930.